When a individual, of any era, is struggling with health problems they might rather keep it personal, trusting that it could be considered a sign of weakness, possibly threatening quality of life, friendships and their choices. This approach improves up anything and bottling things can cause problems to escalate.
We have any notion of the staggering statistics around mental health, stress and suicide until we’re affected or shed someone close. Every 40 seconds a person in the world dies by suicide and it is still the biggest killer of men under 45 in the united kingdom!
There are ways we help both ourselves and others to live a more’connected’ life. Let’s begin by considering young people, who have going on in their lives. Fear of missing out is a factor, as friends post on media images of their lives that are amazing. Little matter that those images edited are introduced and displayed for public consumption. A young person may simply see their friends as being more popular, more happy and successful than them.
They may be in a circle where they’re being bullied, feel inferior distinct. They are struggling with their sexuality, identity, worried about what their future choices and options could be. It can be hard if they are feeling a failure and do not wish to be a disappointment, if they comparing themselves.
Some bad behaviour could be part of the job description for being a teenager, but nonetheless, it’s important to stay in contact with their lives.
- Pay attention. Is your young person behaving differently, is there a change in their attitude? Are they angry silent, are they going out spending time? Sometimes young people don’t want to stress, upset or neglect their loved ones. But that can further increase their stress levels as they fight to deal and keep strong.
- Try to regularly sit and eat together so that the family bond is reinforced. Also it provides the opportunity to see if something is’off’, if their desire has changed, if they’ve become unhappy or withdrawn.
- Treat each as an individual and do things individually rather than always with’the children’. Respect their uniqueness. That way you support them in becoming and developing their own person.
Cultivate the habit of being grateful for a least 3 things each day. Someone giving them a compliment that there’s running water, they’ve food on the table can be a beginning.
- Ensure there are opportunities for’mild’ discussions , rather than sit down, more formal ones. Chatting whilst you are cooking or driving can great times for,’you seem a little more quiet lately’, type conversations. A casual talk can be more valuable than a full size interview and allow them to discuss what is on their minds.
- Provide space for them to speak with freedom. It can be tempting to finish their sentences or second-guess what they are thinking, but even companionable silence can sometimes be fine when it allows time for reflection and processing what is happening internally.
- Praise them for what they do well and include a few of those activities in family time so they receive routine confidence boosts. It’s good to let them share their enthusiasm with the rest of the family.
- Remind them that failure’s fine. It is important to test their limits and move out of their comfort zone. But doing so means risking failure, that not everything is going to be a win or work out as hoped, even. Failure can be part of the light and shade in life; by learning to deal with rejection and setbacks, resilience is taught. Getting up is an important lesson for adult life.
- Encourage them to give back. Volunteering and focusing on something else, like an animal sanctuary or visiting an elderly neighbour can be ways to expand their world, learn empathy and see the larger picture.
- Have a conversation with their instructor to discuss how things are going at school or college. Has any cause for concern changed, is there? Sometimes a red flag can be if your child immerses themselves becoming detached from their friendship bands and so preventing socialising.
And don’t respect seeing your family doctor or therapist for a failure. Doing so be the first step on their road to recovery and can provide valuable guidance.
Susan Leigh, counsellor, hypnotherapist media, writer & contributor provides help with relationship problems, stress management, assertiveness and confidence. She couples works with individual clients and provides service and workshops.